|Separating the grapes from the stems.|
Our wine tasting tour bus had a total of twelve people. Among the various characters were two ladies from Ohio, probably in their late twenties, and if they hadn't said they were from Ohio, I would have sworn they were from Jersey. They each wore a couple of giant sparkly rings, which matched their sparkly diamond-encrusted earrings and designer sunglasses and handbags. I know all of those characteristics could hint at Newport Beach just as well, but something about their mannerisms hinted at Tony Soprano rather than Kobe Bryant.
In any event, the Count, within the first 30 seconds of the trip, had started referring to these women as the "Bling Bling Ladies." I posted on Facebook: "Vince is already pretty tipsy, and he's dubbed two of these people the 'bling bling ladies.' I give it one more winery before he accidentally says it using his outdoor voice. Hehe." We didn't even make it to the next winery. Within 10 minutes after posting it, tipsy Vince yell-whispered a joke about the Bling Bling Ladies. Fortunately, they were talking with the Australian couple and didn't hear it.
|Winery #2...I think. |
Who can freaking remember after all that wine?
|A number of stars have played at that |
venue, including Raffi, aka the Justin Bieber
of my little brother's childhood (his words)
Afterward, we went to dinner with the other guys in the group--for anonymity's sake, I'll refer to the guys by their vocal parts: 1, 2, and 4 (the Count sings the third part)--and 4's friend. This was my first time meeting the guys. Officially, at least. I sat with 4's dad at the Las Vegas show two nights in a row, and he quickly became one of my favorite people. He's an absolutely crackup, and completely unafraid to make himself the butt of a joke. We had a great time. I saw 4 and his dad talking after the Vegas show and waved to them, so I assume his dad told him who I was, because 4 recognized me at the wine country gig.
Anyway, so we're sitting down having dinner, and 4's friend--a young-ish, really talkative chick--had baked cookies for the guys. She sandwiched them between two paper plates and wrapped it in a giant wad of plastic wrap. While she was chattering on to 4 about her latest voice-over gigs, 1 was playing with the wad of plastic wrap while 2 watched.
Me: Wow. That's enough plastic wrap to suffocate a child.
1: Maybe even two.
Me (loud, saucy voice): "I know what *we're* doing later!The four of us (2, 1, the Count, and me) laughed, and then 2 broke off abruptly. "You know what would be weird?" he said. "If you met someone and within the first few minutes they made a joke about suffocating children." Hahaha.....ha....ha.....shit.
|Original here: Hyperbole and a Half|